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When she leaves, there will be time enough for all the things that should have happened and yet didn’t. When she leaves, a space will open to allow what was yearned for but manifested not. When she leaves — in a week or month or year or decade — a leaf would turn to let the newness grow.
When she leaves.
Yet for the time being she remains.
She has no choice. Or not a real one.
She plods along the rutted path made by the heavy feet she’d dragged so many times before. She does what must be done. She smiles. She nods. She cooks. She holds.
She finds in every day a small reminder of the hope. A sliver of a dream. A memory of what is yet to come.
It sustains her.
It has to.
It’s all she has.
Until she leaves.
For the SoCS writing prompt: Leaves
Na'ama Yehuda 
Although you can’t see me, I am nodding as if with understanding. Because maybe I do.
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I hear you …
I wonder how many – especially women – will nod at this, be it for their own lives or in recognition of the lives of other women they knew, or of women they never met and yet live in their collective memories.
For maybe they do …
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Indeed ….
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Outstanding! 💚✨💚
Adele Ryan McDowell, Ph.D.
AdeleRyanMcDowell.com Adeleandthepenguin.com MakingPeacewithSuicide.com Channeledgrace.com
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Thank you, Adele!
May all who must leave, do what they must, when the time is right and the soul is willing.
Hugs! Na’ama
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“When she leaves” was nine years ago for me and I’ve never looked back. Happiness and freedom for one’s self can never be understated. Thank you for this, wonderful post.
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Oh, thank you for this, Mary! I am glad this resonated, and yes, I know it is true for all too many, and that it takes a lot of courage besides. And yet, as you wrote, taking steps toward self-freedom cannot be understated!
Life is so complicated, isn’t it? And yet, there are some things that are simply crucial to hold on to …
Thanks again for the comment!
Na’ama
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Oh yes, yes and yes… I am nodding along with you and Crispina..
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We might start our little noddy-head-trio! I can just see is, perched on dashboards, nodding along … 😉
SORRY, too funny of an image to not share! I made myself laugh out loud (no easy task since I woke up with a migraine and cannot see out of one eye … 😉 — no worries, just not fun)
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You’ve made us into bobble-heads!!
Oh! I am so sorry you woke up with a migraine.. no laughing when in pain – just makes more (from what my sister tells me)
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Well, I can be miserable with a migraine, or be me with a migraine (which does include laughing at my own self-imagined bobble-head rendition…), but, yeah, it does make it worse on the ouchy levels.
My migraines aren’t as horrible as some might be, but they aren’t much fun, either. Fortunately, I have a medication that takes the edge off of it. It’ll pass.
In the meanwhile, I’m no bobble head … just an overcooked noodle. …
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This is true. I think I’d be like you and choose to be me. Then again, if the suffering is often and long – like my sister’s – then it might get more difficult to remain that smiley Josephine.
Yeah. Keep the bobbing to a minimum until it has passed.
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Yes. I don’t mean to say that one must smile all the time, just find what works for them to get through. There’s no one way. No judgment in however one manages.
And … I’m fortunate that my migraines, though challenging, aren’t usually as completely debilitating as I know some migraines can be. When they truly are awful, there’s nothing to do but endure and survive them and hold on to the knowledge that they pass. My heart goes out to your sister if the latter are her ‘usual’.
XOXO Na’ama (de-not-bobbing-head-today)
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Of course not.
And she suffers tremendously. Changes in the atmosphere, certain foods, nitrites… hell on earth for her.
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Poor Bubbah’le … 😦
Yeah, changes in atmosphere are a big culprit, especially combined with whatever hormonal flip-flops one might happen to be riding, and then there are the chemicals in certain foods, fluctuations in sleep and fluids, flickering lights. So many different triggers for different people, and many of them aren’t really avoidable (one can avoid red wine or other nitrates, but it is harder to avoid lightening storms or barometric pressure changes or passing ambulances with lights flickering …). I’m sending her a hug, just because. Now, off to rest my one-working-eye and drink a bit more ginger-lemon tea, my go-to soother-of-tum.
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Yep.
Off you go. Rest your one-working-eye!
Hugs to YOU.
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XOXO
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XOXO
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Wow, I can absolutely relate to this post! Your words say it all. This was me 20 some years ago.
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I’m glad you can relate … even if I’m not glad you had to endure … Still, good for you! 🙂
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