Rawson Lake; photo: Jack Ng
It was their last day by the lake. The weather was perfect and the air was so crisp it squeaked. She inhaled deeply, savoring every moment. By that time tomorrow she’d be stuck in rush-hour traffic.
“See?” he pointed. “Even wood can’t keep its head above water at some point.”
She snuck a hand into his and squeezed. She wished she could give him sips of this place during what was to come. She wished she could tell him this round wouldn’t be as difficult as the ones before. That this one would work. She didn’t know if to hope or fear it being the last. It shattered her that she no longer knew what he hoped for.
She gathered the light around her, kissed his baldness, and rose to stand.
“For now, my love, let’s float.”
For What Pegman Saw: Rawson Lake Canada
This is so poignant and heartfelt. The last paragraph is so powerful. I hope the two in your story reach some calm waters soon.
Thank you, Suzanne! I hope they do, too!
this is so beautiful it brings tears to my eyes… and memories of one lost too soon. Just really really awesome this is.
I am so sorry for your loss. There is so much of that … too much of that. Thank you for your comment, and I am heartened it resonated. Take good care!
Beautiful piece of writing, Na’ama. You are a gifted writer indeed!
Thank you my friend!
A beautiful write Na’ama, I love how she gathered the light around her 💜 xxx
Thank you, my friend! 🙂 May we all have just enough light around us when we need it.
Oh so gorgeous and sad. Love this poignant story. Great to see you one Pegman!
Thank you!
So many of us had encountered variations on loss and the succor of nature. I’m glad this resonates.
Re: Pegman … I’ve stopped by once (or twice?) before, and I plan to continue to do so once in a while — this is a fun and unique challenge!
You’ve written a terrific story. Great description, wonderful construction and full of emotional depth – the ambivalence of both characters in the face of certain suffering and possible death for him. Very, very good indeed.
Thank you, Penny, for a very kind and helpful comment! I’m so glad it spoke to you. 🙂
wow – your writing is nice and has your flair – fav line here was this:
“Even wood can’t keep its head above water at some point.”
but the cohesive piece has me hoping for the best for them
Thank you for the lovely comment! As someone who tends to write more rather than less … (I’d written several full-length novels, articles, book chapters, and a professional book), I find that sometimes very short stories can end up stripped too bare for meaning. The flash-fiction is a lovely exercise in writing for me, and I’m glad the ‘feel’ came through! You are very kind. 🙂
well this was SURELY NOT stripped bare
quite the opposite for me –
so thumb up from moi
🙂 Thank you!
Yes, I loved that line too. It’s the pivot about which the whole story moves, and it’s a cracker!
🙂
This was absolutely beautifully done, Na’ama… When you get to that place when you don’t know what to hope for… it is so very difficult….
Thank you, Dale. Indeed it may be one of the most painful places … May we never have to face it too often, and may we always have a friend to take our hand and squeeze it in support. Hugs your way! Na’ama
Right back at you! xo
I like the squeaky-clean air. Neat piece.
Thank you! 🙂
Lovely sad piece. What is it about Nature’s rich austerity that brings us to such serious reflections on existence?
Loved many of your phrases, from “air so crisp, it squeaked”, to the poignant “it shattered her that she no longer knew what he hoped for.” Well done.
Thank you! Yes, I think nature can crystalize many a feeling. Maybe it is that some places allow us to reconnect with our connection to all there is, or quiet out mind enough to help our heart take center stage. Beauty in of itself is moving. Thank you for your comment and interesting perspective!
Sweet and touching story – a shared suffering between them that I hope holds them together through whatever they face in the future. Lovely
Thank you for the comment and kind feedback, Lynn. May it be so!
My pleasure
A beautiful piece, to bare the soul, and let that love flow. So what if there are a few tears? They are love’s lubricant.
Indeed! Thank you for this lovely comment! Na’ama