
Photo Credit: Joy Pixley
It had been a long trek on an oven of a day in what had to be a replica of hell. I was parched half-way to mummification and about as lively as the end result, but Mark seemed as bouncy as a pixie in morning dew.
He checked the map. “Twenty more feet!”
Either he didn’t notice the forest of thorns (and its likely residents) or didn’t care. He was in his element. I definitely was not.
I’d joined THOR (Treasure Hunters Of Renown) a month prior, on the rebound from a breakup. The local chapter was small but Mark’s enthusiasm was contagious and the prospects were exciting. We compared topography maps with old mining records and discussed unsolved mysteries of lost gold from the bandit days of the Wild West. Hunting treasure sounded alluring. It made me feel brave. From the AC.
“I’m not going in there!” I croaked with a drywall tongue as my mind filled with images of scorpions and my ears strained for rattlers. I was sure I’d heard the cackle of ghosts.
If I made it home alive, the only treasures I wanted were a cool drink, my couch, and my remote.
Loved this, Na’ama!
Nice to read a longer piece from you… and I’m with her… gimme a drink and some A/C
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If you want a MUCH longer read … I did write three full length novels … π (I’m actually a lot more known for my wordiness than for being succinct … which of course made me interested in getting better at short-shorts … π – no pun! ;)).
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Tee hee! Well. So far, this is how I know you. And I love how these prompts, like FF force us to learn how to cut – something that will come in handy in a little bit as I cut back my current post. Crap. I’m at 1665 words and I ain’t done yet… Sigh
So yeah, three novels, eh? Published and all? Gonna have to check you out then! π
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Totally! Great exercise for keeping the message while pruning some of them wordy-words, eh? What I love about FF, and some of the other writing challenges. Keeps that old-brain a bit more pliable in the bargain, too … (and in the AC).
How much more do ya need to cut your post? I don’t mind reading longer ones, for the record …
As per my books — one way is to hover on the “books and publications” tab at the top of the page … π
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It’s been a great exercise in eliminating the unnecessary fluff… And yes, does keep that grey matter in good working condition
Oh, I realise some people don’t mind. but right now I’m hovering near the 1800 word mark. I’m finally done and will start pruning shortly.
Yes, I shall hover away π
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Happy pruning, hovering, and any other AC-with-a-drink activity you fancy … π
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π Sounds like a perfect plan.
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I love this. You wrote it with such a sense of immediacy I began to think THOR was a real group and the story was true. The tag at the bottom telling me it was a fiction was almost a let down – though I wouldn’t have enjoyed that hike I did enjoy doing it virtually.
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You and me both on the virtual enjoyment of such a hike… π So glad it spoke to you and rang true!
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At least someone is thinking and talking sense.
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π talking sense is always a good thing … π
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Ha ha ha, she seems to be just like me! And I loved the name THOR, of course π
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π Glad you liked it! … and yeah … I think a lot of us can relate … π
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Coach-Potatoes of the World Unite!
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LOL! Especially if the other alternative is rattlesnakes, thorns, and scorpion! π
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Definitely!
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Very nice, I too would feel the same.
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π Some of us are meant to crawl in briars and scare away scorpions … π
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A very enjoyable story.
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Not for the narrator, though … π
Thank you, Susan!
It was a fun one to write!
Na’ama
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